miscommunicated

i have been cast out again,
hands and knees on doorsteps i don’t know.
there are noises i cannot explain;
the buzzing i hear on the streets
as i stand with eyes cloaked,
waiting for revelation i don’t believe in.
you must have hope with your expectation;
nothing comes if not by faith first
and i have only come to expect the worst.

if

if you only knew the thoughts i’ve thought;
the feelings i’ve felt; the wonders i’ve wondered.
so much goes unsaid, unheard and hidden;
left to allegory, it’s barely even written.
if only to say the things i’m afraid to mean,
to express the chance of what may have been.
there is so much in life we can’t help but miss,
left to only ask ourselves, what if?

too far

this distance suffocates,
these miles dig into my skin,
pulling at my resistance
to emotions i try to forget.
my heart thunders
even when it barely beats;
there is rarely a breath i can catch
during the days apart.
if only i could fall to pieces
to be here and there at once.
words, tears and desperation
are caught, tangled in mind and tongue.
come home.

sophronismos

What sweet release this is. I have removed my confidence in earth; this blessed and beautiful Terra has little for me and will not withstand. Tomorrows will fade, todays will be forgotten. But this heart in me is eternal; the foundation I found is everlasting. I am free to fail, free to fall, free to love, and free to seek, confident that everything I desire will come to me as it should. I have no need for I am well provided for, I have little care for my burdens are not my own. There is a warmth creeping up, a smile that refuses to fade. Tears of joy are flooding my world, and my fears are washed away. This new life is simple and clean: a canvas ready for the making. The strokes are all my own, applied with the color of faith: deep, rich, memorable. I have found within myself a light, a certainty; His presence is pure grace.

He sings to me…

you sing to me my destiny;
the melody on your lips is prose
meant for my ears alone.
where this rhythm leads, Lord,
I will follow until the end:
across any bridge,
by any course or path.
the line I walk with You
is delicate and thin;
but if ever I forget the way
you are there with me,
serenading my heart again.

laughter

let it be heard in the dark;
let mirth ring out in the shadows.
Lord, i pray send even just one
who can smile with me.
despite the depravity
that ravages the earth,
let the joy and security
that your promises gives
calm all of our doubts.
in the face of adversity
it is your features i see,
and in every circumstance
you show beauty to me.